Friday, June 10, 2005

the first cut is deepest...

The First Cut Is The Deepest

"i would have given you all of my heart
but there's someone who's torn it apartand
he's taken just all that i have
but if you want i'll try to love again
baby, i'll try to love again,
but i know...the first cut is the deepest
baby i knowthe first cut is the deepest
but when it comes to bein' lucky,
he's cursed
when it comes to lovin' me,

he's worst...i still want you by my side
just to help me dry the tears that i've cried
and i'm sure gonna give you a try
if you want i'll try to love again, (try)baby, i'll try to love again,
but i know...OOHHH,the first cut is the deepest
baby i knowthe first cut is the deepest
but when it comes to bein' lucky,
he's cursed
but when it comes to lovin' me,
he's worst...i still want you by my side
just to help me dry the tears that i've cried
but i'm sure gonna give you a try
cuz if you want i'll try to love again

iLL make Love 2 U..bye boyz II men

Close your eyes, make a wish And blow out the candlelight
For tonight is just your night We're gonna celebrate,
all thru the night Pour the wine, light the fire
Girl your wish is my command
I submit to your demands I'll do anything, girl you need only ask

Chorus:
I'll make love to you
Like you want me to And I'll hold you tight
Baby all through the night
I'll make love to you When you want me to
And I will not let go Till you tell me to Girl relax,
let's go slow I ain't got nowhere to go
I'm just gonna concentrate on you Girl are you ready,
it's gonna be a long night T
hrow your clothes on the floor I'm gonna take my clothes off too
I made plans to be with you Girl whatever you ask me you know I'll do

Chorus
Baby tonight is your night And I will do you right Just make a wish on your night Anything that you ask I will give you the love of your life

im still here...

I found the pieces in my hand They were always there
It just took some time to understand
You gave me words I just can't say

So if nothing else I'll hold on while you drift away
Cause everything you wanted me to hide Is everything that makes me feel alive
Cities grow Rivers flow Where you are,
I'll never know But I'm still here
If you were right and I was wrong Why are you the one that's gone
I'm still here Still here Seeing the ashes in my heart
The smile the widest When I cry inside and my insides blow apart
I tried to wear another face Just to make you proud
Just to make you put me in my place
But everything you wanted to take from me Is everything that I could never be
Cities grow Rivers flow Where you are, I'll never know But I'm still here

If you were right and I was wrong
Why are you the one that's gone
I'm still here Maybe tonight It's gonna be alright
I will get better Maybe today It's gonna be okay
I will remember I held the pieces of my soul I was shattered
and I wanted you to come and make me whole
When I saw you yesterday But you didn't noticed
And you just walked away Cause everything you wanted me to hide
Is everything that makes me feel alive

Cities grow Rivers flow Where you are,
I'll never know But I'm still here If you were right and I was wrong
Why are you the one who's gone And I'm still here
The lights go out, the bridges burn
Once you're gone, you can't return I'm still here Remember how you use to say
I'd be the one to runaway
But I'm still here......

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

2 bulan lagihT_T

blkangan ini..gak tau napa dha lagi...syuka ngerasa boriiiing bnet..:( hikz
ga da mood bwad ngapa2in...
bwad chating...bwad hunting :D,bwad browsing..
aagghh..pokokNya dha gi ga mood bwad ngapa2in...
i wish..all would be over as soon as possible...
gak pernah ngebayangin klo 2 bulan itu...trasa lamaa bnet klo ditungguin..

hUhu..dHa dah aNeeN Bnet ma mama..
aneen ma bapak yg syukaNya ngomel2 ga jls diblkg :D
ma widhie..yg ktNya dah punya pacar baru..
ma tommy yg byasanya bobo ma dha..tp syuka gebukin perut dha klo gi marah..trus nangis klo kalah..:D hueheueheu
ma yogha...yg kata mama dah gede dan suka maen2 telpon2nan sendiri smbil mggl2 dha..
hikz...
ma aris...yg udah janji mo ngajakin dha ke pengandaran lagih...klo dha dah balik...
ma mardi..yg hobinya nyaci maki dha..ga ada bosennya..HuHuhu
ma yHayhat...kaka sepupu dha yg plg cakep seduniya...:p
ma iiN...my bloved niece plg ksayangannya dha...plg tercinta...plg lutju...yg syukanya niru2 inuL
hehehehehe...syuka ngikut2 dha kmna2,ga ada bosennya..
ma nia adhenya aris..
ma miftahul janah,wiwin,siti,aan,irpan,eko,sepul,arif,raRa,riza,tika,huhuhu sapa lagih yak??
ma mas utik...sepupu dha yg plg meratiin dha..dr kecil mpe dewasa
ma tutur...ma wajam,wakarno..yg syg bnet ma dha...
kakiNe,niNine,bapaTuwa...kanG daRyO,Mba iRoH,mas Pa'i,mBa TiTi,lik maRgo,Lik TaR,LIk saKim,Lik daiMah,wa Ono,wa MaR..taTi...yg ktNya dah ngasih dha keponakan baru..
hikz..hikz...i mizz them aLL!!:((

anen ma icha....emi..intan...yg dulu suka jalan2 muter2 kampung boncengan ma trisno jg :(
ma yanto...sikustiono,akso,tanto,mame..,nono,purwanto,OoM napin yg dulu suka dha pgl2 "narapidana nasioanal"hueheueheue

anen ma jenny..my first BF di kampoonG..
yg skrg..entahlah....mkin tidak karuwan tingkah bejatnya....yg dulu...plg syayang ma dha..
plg perhatian ma dha..plg lmbut ma dha...ngajarin dha bwad first kisses...:D
ngajarin dha bwad setia..bwad sabar..nunggu...
bwad jd org yg wise...dan bwad jd pacar yg dewasa...dlm ngadepin kondisi pacaran kita waktu itu....
dan skrg..18Oo udah brubah jd...uncontroL???yeah maybe..n i dunno why...:(
meski skrg msh jd temen..tp...nemu dia yg keknya bukan jenny yg pernah dha knal dulu...
hOhoHo..feel..uncomfort bwad dha..
god..may he find the way...to be rite again...amieeen..

ugh....
2 bln....its about..60 days again...
why so looooong...:((

i do really mizz them all

without wax

-dha-

Monday, June 06, 2005

dear diary

Dear DiaryDear, dear diary, I want to tell my secrets Cuz you're the only one that I know who'll keepthem Dear, dear diary, I want to tell my secrets I know you'll keep them,
and this is what I'vedone I've been a bad, bad girl for so long I don't know how to change what went wrong Daddy's little girl when he went away What did it teach me? That love leaves

Dear, dear diary, I want to tell my secrets Cuz you're the only one that I know who'll keepthem Dear, dear diary, I want to tell my secrets I know you'll keep them, and this is what I'vedone
I've been down every road you could go I made some bad choices as you know Seems I have the whole world cradled in my hands But its just like me not to understand

Dear, dear diary, I want to tell my secrets Cuz you're the only one that I know who'll keepthem Dear, dear diary, I want to tell my secrets I've been a bad, bad girl
I learned my lessons I turned myself around I've got a guardian angel tattooed on my shoulder
She's been watching over me

Dear, dear diary, I want to tell my secrets Cuz you're the only one that I know who'll keepthem Dear, dear diary, I want to tell my secrets I've been a bad, bad girl
Dear, dear diary, I want to tell my secrets Cuz you're the only one that I know who'll keepthem Dear, dear diary, I want to tell my secrets I've been a bad, bad girl

I've been a bad, bad girl....

pink lyrics..dear diary

Friday, June 03, 2005

UntiTleD

Each night I go to bed, I say ma prayers and i bow ma head. Sunkn deep in love's lust, i think i might just, wait until I see ur face or wait for all love's embrace.
I dream of u and i cant contain i feel u but i cant touch i want to grab u but i cant reach i want u but i cant have u if this be ma dreams why cant i hold u???

I thought I loved you, I thought you loved me too. I've dreamt of you each night, And all the time was true.
I remember when you asked me, When you and I became we. I thought we were so perfect, But I should have known we could never be.
I don't know why I still love you, I ask myself each day through. How could I be so stupid? But what was I to do.
I believed every word you said, Every lie that you spread. Why did you do it know when you knew it would effect me, Why did you do it if you knew I would be dead?

-DhA-

untitled

That boy I once loved watches,
he watches me cry in pain.

He watches me scream his name,
he watches me wherever I go.

He watches me belittle myself,
he watches me every sec.

He watches me cry over him,
he watches me when he is with her.

He knows i hate her,
but their still together.

He know how i feel about him,
he knows i still love him.

He stares at me like i am crazy,
deep inside i know he still loves me. (is that true???)

He knows i live in darkness without him,
he knows i cut myself.

He knows i will always love
no matter what gurl he is with

but every now and then you watch me cry
because i am not with you.....

-DhA-

Tuesday, May 24, 2005


Posted by HelloangeLswitHbrokeNwings..tHats Me:(
If I could be with you
I would dedicate my time
To keeping you happy and loved
So that your heart would beat with mine
I feel alone without your touch
my wings just feel broken and diseapears..
My heart can beat no more
My touch is cold
,my knees are weak
I fear what life has in store Alone
I feel in this world so cold
But the feelings I express are true
So I ask you again,
for the hundreth time
If I could be with you
....again....
repair my wings..baby..
without wax
idha
i doNt kNow..how to take my self..rite now..
im sick with what i feel...
im sick..with...my feelin..
i really wish..i could accept..that im not gut enough for him...
yeah..like he said to me...samtime we need to forget our dreams.....
but is thiz fair for me...??
n then...im feel shame with my self...
i dun have any precedence to ask him to play fair..bot my feelin....bot..what we'd share when we still 2gthr...
i dont have any idea..to take my self..in the rite place..
all seems wrong..

dha pgn berontak...pengen..bilang..ga adil bgt apa yg udah dia lakuin ma dha..
tp dha ngerasa ga punya cukup hak bwad bilang kek gini ma diya..
be2 qita udah share byk hal....
i though....smuanya bakal ga kek gini...

dha binun musti gimana mentuin sikap dha ma diya...
dha bener2 broke into pieces..
dha ga penen dendam ma diya...he ever became my true fren...
one upon a time...
nemenin dha..saat dha lg butuh temen...ndegerin dha saat dha lg penen cerita..lift me up...
dr keterpurukan2nya dha,mbuat dha py passion lg bwad syg ma org sepenuh hati
mbuwat dha ketawa...mbuat idup dha yg sebelumnya bnr2..complicated..jd bae lg..dgn perhatian2..dan sygnya dia ma dha..:(

dha penen jd temen dia lg kek dulu...kyk yg dia minta ma dha..kmren..
but..still..saat ini dha ngerasa bnr2 lom bs nerima kenyataan klo dha disakiti lagi....
so hurt...when u love samwan..but then..knowin that he never love me...
seakan2 cuma mbuwat qita sbg pengisi kekosongan aja???
give me dreams...n then...burn all till we feel we are in da hell..

i just died

Staring in the mirror as I
Start to carefully contemplate
Just really how deep is this thing I have for you
It's wearing on my heart
And from the start you know I tried, steadily denied
Friendship turn to love
I know you probably think that I'm so strange -
Stuttering on every word when you look my way, why?And maybe it's all in my mind
But when we hugged goodbye I had butterflies
I just died
I just died in your arms tonight
Don't want nobody to bring me back to life I just died in your arms I just died in your arms tonight, tonight
Your finger hushed my lips
As I tried to explain maybe why you and I should hide from such a love affair
My friends think that I'm so insane
To fight this feeling
But my life's at stakeYour embrace, thoughts won't erase
Every now a minute of the day I wait and hope and pray
That you might stay
And now you're moving so closely
Killing me so softly, so softly
I just died

Saturday, May 14, 2005

aLL bout NothiN'

gw boring....

have No oNe here to company me..:(
thiz is a boring weekend..,i guess!!
dha kangen sama mama....
oh gosh..never imagine that..4 month .....can be so long like thiz..
i really..really missing her much...
last time..i called her...
i just wanna said..that i do really missin' her much...
but then..i heard she cried...spechless cant say aniting...
that is a very2 touchy moment..yupz..!
my mom owes like that...
cried..cried..n cried..evtime...i called her or evtime...i leave her..!
i knew how much she loved me...

i remember..when i was still @ home..my mom cried 4 me..evrinite 4 about one month be4 im gone.....
im so saad...!!i never wanted she lost her tears 4 a fu**** daughter like me....
but she'd done!!!
i dont know how to describes thiz..but i do really missin' her much...
she's the best mom i ever had!!!!in thiz universe!!!

i love her much......
i really need her rite now.....
i want she hold me.......
mom..see now im feel so lonely.......
did u think bout me too rite now mom???

i love u....i noe iam a bad daughter...but...i love u so much....
how proud my self can be the part of ur life...
may god bless u...whereever u r rite now...

i love u so much mom...

i miss you so much..

i need you so much mom...
:((

-dha-

Saturday, May 07, 2005

my though

i dunno what to write...
i just didnt have any idea to write..
but...i guess i want to write samting..
but dunno how to start..

its the new begining of my life..iwish...
i had a lovely boyfren...i wish...he would my last love journey..
its hard 4 me to believing 2 samwan...since..so many things happen to me in thiz recent month..
but..i do really want to try to believe in samwan..
we decided to be a lover...
yupz...dunno how to describes...he just make me better in all de way..
he gave me light when i think my life just full of darkness
i love evri inch of him...
how he treats me....i just love the way he try to loves me...
im feel so grateful when he said that he want to love me......n want i love him also..
when he said that he need me......missing me....
no one said thiz be4...yeah...no one said that they need me...
though...maybe they need me...but heard from him...that he need me..its just..feel like...
oh gosh.....gimme back my confidenity...
yupz...there is..still samwan that need me....

im try to close all my past book...
try to start the new beginning of my life with him...
i know...its not easy..to keep thiz feeling...
but ill try...
i just wanna give my feeling to samwan...
iwant to be a good lover for samwan...
i want to love samwan with my heart...
i want...missing samwan much...
i want to feel...love...
i just try to be loved..n hopefully one day i would be loved..

dear my baby...
i know..i cant show u how much i loved u rite now...
but...if u want to believe..
i really want to love u..with evting iam...
let me love u bebi...
let me always be in your heart...
i dont have a rite word to say...how u means to me...
but being with u..
just the best things i have in thiz time
thx 4 all that u've done to me....

just one more step...n i promise i would comes next ur door..give evriting that u need...

i love ya my dear...